- September 30th, 2012
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So the time has finally come. The Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion is here.
Everyone who watches and loves the show is anticipating there will be fighting, brawling, name calling, and crying.
And guess what? That’s exactly what you’re going to get.
But what you won’t see are the real tears that fell after the camera stopped rolling. The real friendships that ended. The real family that was left holding pieces of what once was. The questions that were left unanswered.
Was the hour’s filming dramatic? I was there – I can tell you of course it was. But it was also painful to watch, because at one time this group of ladies were family and friends – real family and real friends – but now they’re just fighting to stay relevant. Fighting to prove a point. Fighting over camera time, Fighting over hearsay and bullshit.
Is the 15 minutes of fame worth all the heartache? Is it worth ending a friendship? Tearing a family apart?
Does it make sense to encourage “teams” of followers who don’t know these people to take sides and rip families and former friends apart?
And is it worth the pain to have real children be part of the reality tv mess and call it entertainment?
No matter how much wetry to shield our children they still will hear about it. They will see it. They will have to live things that they don’t truly understand, over and over. And if you’re “lucky” and it’s caught on film they will have it for the rest of their lives to see, to hear their real aunts or cousins call each other names. To see a friendship that at one time was great fall apart and have hate take over.
Is this really the example we’re willing to set for our children?
Is it ok to have fans judge you, your friends or your family over a one hour episode of reality tv? To attack a family member personally and publicly over her sexual preference and encourage the madness – but never once trying to end it?
I suppose in a way it is ok, because it’s what everyone signed up for. But what they didn’t sign up for was all the hurt, all the pain, all the embarrassment that follows along.
I personally know every Housewife from the show – not all of them very well, but well enough to make my own judgment.
And I can say this with a clear mind. The names that the fans are calling them, the hate that is being put out on Twitter and Facebook and all of the blogs are so mean, so hurtful – so unfair and so unthinking.
Before you actually judge any of these ladies, you’d have to meet them. Don’t just pick your favorite. Meet all of them, then make your judgment. Because just watching one hour of tv a week does not give you - or anyone – the right to call someone a dyke, afat ass, a clown, an alcoholic or any of the other nasty comments out there.
These are real women who have real feelings. They’re not actresses playing a role – it’s real life, real family, real friends. Real tears and real heartache.
Because I am personally involved, it hurts me to read all the negative things being put out. All the rumors about the reunion… and half of them aren’t even true. What should be known is how upset everyone was. How one of them was crying so much no one knew what to do. How a grown man was sitting at a table like a zombie with tears in his eyes all night. How a cousin was so sick she couldn’t catch her breath. Watching a grown woman become a child in front of my eyes crushed me.
What you won’t see Sunday is all of the hurt and all of the heartache.
I hope this makes sense to just one person, because one less name called – or one less hateful comment – means you read beyond the bullshit, beyond the fake blogs. It means that you got in touch with realreality and understood that one hour of entertainment to us is a lifetime to them.